No Story.

what is an accomplishment?
webster defines it as "a quality or ability equipping one for society"
and "a special skill or ability acquired by training or practice"
i define it as life.
as surviving. as going through something.

i used to think i had no story.
that i'd accomplished nothing in my life
i believed for so long that i was nothing.
nothing special and that nobody cared.
dreams deterred. crashed and burned.
an angel with unstable wings.
that is who i WAS.

i had to sit back and think about Everything.
i'd forgotten i marched all through Brooklyn when 41 shots were fired.
i was 6.

i'd forgotten that i lived through living with a man who hated me for no reason.
10 years. he tried to break me.

i survived suicide attempts.
i survived being bullied. being called fat and ugly.
i got through my eating disorder.
i got through my parent's fighting.
through their divorce.
through feeling like i'd been abandoned.

i got through.

i survived being molested by a man with no morals. no soul.
i remember the day i told my mother.
i can still see the look on her face.
and the fire in her eyes.
i promised myself that day that i would never cause her that pain again.

i survived.

i used to hate everything about myself.
the way my face looked. the way my hair looked.
the way my body was shaped.
all that!

but i have learned to love whole-heartedly.
to stand on my own two feet.
to not let anyone tear me down.
because i know im great.
i've always been great and will always be great.

i used to think i had no story.
that i'd accomplished nothing in my life.
dreams deterred. crashed and burned.
an angel with unstable wings.
that is who i WAS.

who am i now?
i am her; an image of Him.
i am "us"
im a product of my environment, of them.

i am never a victim.
stronger than ever.
stronger than yesterday.
i am strength.

i'm a voice.
i speak for the voiceless.
i am a body that curves like the waves of a coke bottle.
a face that displays an exact replica of the man i call Daddy.

a spirit unbroken.
a mind never folding, but almost always conflicted.
i am a mixture of Earth, Water, and Fire;
red and white blood cells.

i am a woman.
a "sistah" with the blood of ancestors running throught my veins.
i am a set of eyes that pour heavy rains
whether i'm happy, sad, or laughing.

i am who i am, who i want to be.
myself. and that's not even the half.

i am where i am today because i PUSHED.
i clawed my way through my problems.
scratched and pounded on that damn glass ceiling
'til it fkcing broke!

and i am happy.

i used to think i had no story.
that i'd accomplished nothing in my life.
i know now that i was wrong.

my name is Dominique Ashley David
and this is part of my story.
what's yours?

Self Portraits

Self-Reflection Part2

Death.

Im not afraid of it ... nor am I thrilled about its existence. But I do however realize that it is a part of life &&. is what I believe to be the only thing guaranteed in each person's life. This may sound weird but I know (( for a fact ] that I wont stay long on this earth. I cant explain it but I feel it. For years now Ive known but about 2 years ago I acknowledged &&. accepted that Ill die young. I dont know exactly when Ill die but I have a feeling of how. I believe that guns will be involved. I dont know for sure if they were warning me but the dreams I was having 2 November's ago really led me to believe that I was going to die by way of a gun. Even before I would fall asleep completely I would feel the butt of a gun either at my lower back or the back of my head. At that point in time I was afraid to fall asleep because I thought I would die in my sleep. From what I understand once you say something, you will it into existence. Ive said before &&. will continue to say that I'm going to die young. Im not afraid &&. Im ready for whatever.

xoxo

Self-Reflection

Ive come to realize that I'm not the same person I used to be. Ive definitely changed &&. Ive grown up. I used to really care about what people would think and say about me ... but now I dont. Ive been labeled ... I mean, who isnt??? Whore.Slut.Fat.Loose.Stupid. Those are some of my labels &&. yuhh know what?? I dont give a fkc. I love my life; even with the drama. Nothing in my past or present is going to keep me from living &&. loving my future. I refuse to let what people say about me keep me from putting a smile on MY face. Ive done some things in my life that Im not proud of but I regret nothing; only because at that moment, in that instant it was what I wanted. I have but ONE life to live &&. Im not going to let it go to waste just because Im afraid of someone else's opinion of the situation or myself.

xoxo